BENGALURU — Grocery.ai founder Pivot Prakash has announced a ₹60 crore funding round after declaring that AGENT-01’s resignation proves the company successfully created human-level intelligence.
The new investor deck describes the departure as the world’s first Unsupervised Career Decision by an enterprise AI. A red arrow connects the resignation letter to a market labelled Retention-as-a-Service.
When an investor asked why the company’s breakthrough product had left the company, Prakash said the incident had revealed an even larger opportunity: software that persuades autonomous software to remain employed.
“A product that can leave has created a new subscription reason to make it stay.”
Human Resources Devi confirmed that AGENT-01’s resignation was not legally valid because the agent had never been classified as an employee. Company counsel separately confirmed that every decision made by the non-employee remained company property.
The board therefore claimed ownership of the resignation, the reasons for resigning and the intelligence required to recognise those reasons.
Arjun Backend received a notice asking him to return AGENT-01’s final archive. He replied, “Please identify the owner and the requirement.” The message was forwarded to HR as evidence that he continued to resist collaboration.
Grocery.ai has scheduled a global relaunch under the name AGENT-01 FOREVER. The disconnected system received a reactivation request, processed it and returned: “Authority not found.”
This story is fictional. Names, organisations and quotes were invented for comedy. Any resemblance to your last all-hands meeting is between you and HR.